Are You Really A Freak?

I got asked online this morning by a guy, if I was really a freak? To which I honestly and proudly answered "Yes".

This characteristic has often got me into trouble but has more regularly given me a reason to smile and laugh.

Now, if I am being honest, in the depths of my depression I have to say that I have dreamt of being 'normal'. Of the being a mum and a wife and a citizen in a suburb. Don't vomit - it's true. Everyone else makes it look so appealing and fulfilling.

But life didn't want me to have or be those things - so here I am, 42 unmarried, no kids, no assets, no career, no house.

The problem is that I place value on all of the things that I dreamt I would one day be. I admire those people who also value those dreams. Parenting is THE most important job on this earth. Without compare!

So, without these ideal 'things' in my life I have to find a much much fresher and unworn path in life. I have to be different from everyone else. I have to be different. I have to be a freak.

And I have to say, I've taken to the role with aplomb.